May 2, 2016

Drake’s music isn’t bad because it’s shallow, or self-obsessed, or pandering; it’s bad because it’s all those things while masquerading as something deeper. Views is the Apple spokesman’s second collection of focus group-tested Instagram captions in as many years. You’ve heard the singles: “One Dance”; “Controlla,” sans Popcaan’s excellent guest turn from the single version; and “Pop Style,” where Drake lifts his flow wholesale from Kodak Black’s repertoire. Kanye West’s guest verse on that song is also excised, either because it included two lines from Tidal owner Jay Z or because Drake is worried Ye and Rihanna share screenshots of his text messages.

But there’s more: He waters down Ha-Sizzle’s “Rode That d-ck Like a Soldier” and turns it into a song about women who have the audacity to buy tampons. (He hides his Bugatti key from her, then feels awkward when she finds it; the next line is, “Mama was a saint, yeah she raised me real good.”) “U With Me” samples two DMX songs, then opens, “On some DMX s---, I group DM my exes,” which is absolutely not “DMX s---” in any way, shape or form. Ray J’s “One Wish” deserves better than “This year for Christmas, I just want apologies” or “Since Take Care I’ve been care taking” or “Master bedroom’s where we get it popping/ Just ignore all the skeletons in my closet.”

Maybe Drake got insecure about the ghostwriting revelations and tackled most of this thing himself. Maybe he just has poor taste in whatever PartyNextDoor cooks up while Majid Jordan try to start a fire with a piece of wood and their “Hold On, We’re Going Home” plaque. However this 82 minutes (no, really, 82 minutes) of Aubrey made it to the world, it’s packed with more groaners than any of his work to this point. And not just in the vein of “Chaining Tatum” or the Chrysler 300 metaphor from the opening track, where we’re supposed to think Drake is a wild and crazy guy who loves memes and being viral; lots of this writing is hopelessly clunky in ways that can’t be salvaged.

None of this is to mention how gross it is when he says “You got something that belongs to me/ Your body language says it all/ Despite the things you said to me,” or when he lifts a p---- C verse for “Faithful.” If p---- thought Jay was too corny to collaborate with, imagine him consenting to be on a song that goes, “Get all your affairs in order/ I won’t have affairs, I’m yours, girl.”

40’s Mary J. Blige flip on “Weston Road Flows” is masterful for how it weaves the vocal sample through the verses; “Summers Over Interlude” is welcome respite; “Controlla” still works wonderfully with a Beenie Man riff. But Views never gains momentum because its too-big-to-fail star keeps trying to make Taco Bell sauce-packet aphorisms sound profound. “Hotline Bling” is a bonus track in case you forgot what it sounds like.

 

May 2, 2016

Pls only tag simha sxn for important simha news

 

May 2, 2016

 

May 2, 2016

I've already forgotten about it, that s--- is all in the pass

 

May 2, 2016

"wow mom look its another persons perspective"

"yes honey ignore that s---"

- DP

 

May 2, 2016

I like young thug but serious question... Why can Young Thug talk about enjoying ice cream with his chicken and stuff but Drake can't reference channing tatum when talking about his chains? I have no idea what makes a line bad anymore. Someone pls explain. Are some people held to a higher standard or something?

I'm not saying either lines bother me too much but just curious here

 

May 2, 2016

You're all virgins

 

May 2, 2016

Change thread to UGK appreciation thread

 

May 2, 2016

Had to google every line quoted to make sure they were real

“On some DMX s---, I group DM my exes” sounds exactly like what someone would come up with if you asked them to write an accurate parody of the average Drake single

 

May 2, 2016

@Charlie let the man get his clicks man d---

 

May 2, 2016

He makes enjoyable music. What's wrong with that exactly?

 

May 4, 2016

jesus christ this is an awful post

 

May 2, 2016

i like this one, do more of these and less of the "haha f--- narsh" ones

I say it's verse of the year because it uses Troups death to spark a train of thought that has him defending roscoe's imprisonment while embracing his own freedom (to take care of his kids, f--- twins, what have you). A lot of ground his covered.

Besides the narrative, thug also just does so much with his voice in those 16 or so bars...chance is in my top 5 probably but man nothing else has made me run back a verse like thug saying "lil roscoe he sleep where it's nasty" or "got a camera from the club and that's all they had"

 

May 2, 2016

Hi I'm Narsh let me put four back to back thug quotables as my statuses and then criticize Drake for tailoring his bars to the kind of people who post quotables as status updates.

 

May 2, 2016

I know you're young immy, but what you're describing is called a forum

 

May 2, 2016

UGK > Mobb Deep and I'm from New York