Strong urges to get back with a toxic girlfriend

Started by Spatula, Feb 11, 2026 at 6:21 AM, in Life Add to Reading List

  1. Spatula
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    Spatula that you want

    Feb 11, 2026 at 6:21 AM
    Had a horrible sudden breakup with my gf after she got drunk again and was a mean drunk again (demons inside her come out). Told her last time there will be no more chances, she said she can drink moderately, promised. Happened again. Broke up with her, she refused to leave, started causing chaos in the house, I called the cops, she started hitting me, kicked her out, she almost knocked the doors down, cops came, took her.

    Constant fights even without alcohol, but god d--- all I see now is the good times. I am a weak man and I consider getting in touch with her and try to fix things. I am torn. This is hard.
     
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  2. Ripper Roo
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    Ripper Roo Last of a Dying Breed

    Feb 11, 2026 at 8:08 AM
    I’m sorry but it’s not worth it dude. I don’t care what good times you had with her, how pretty she is, how good the p---- is, etc. She’s never going to actually fix her alcoholism if you keep going back to her. It’ll just keep getting worse because she’ll see that you keep coming back to her no matter how horrible she is. She needs to deal with the consequences of what she’s doing and maybe even hit rock bottom to truly see the error of her ways and finally get help for her addiction. She has to truly wanna get better for HERSELF, not for you. If she is only getting better for you it’ll never work. You can’t fix her.
     
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  3. Minato
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    Minato Eminem’s Burner Account

    Feb 11, 2026 at 8:20 AM
    Agree. It’s an endless cycle. And people wonder why I’m single. No h---, but Kim just didn’t hit the spot like my dildo
     
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  4. Michael Myers
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    Michael Myers Moderator

    Feb 11, 2026 at 9:14 AM
    It's your decision brother, but my advise would be very short: don't.
     
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  5. BIGFOOT
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    BIGFOOT More than a myth!

    Feb 11, 2026 at 10:28 AM
    Definitely avoid dude toxic relationship will end up hurting your mental health Trust me I've been there. Do you have children with her?
     
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  6. Ricky
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    Ricky mixtape: 05/16/26

    Feb 11, 2026 at 11:00 AM
    f--- no, dont be stupid, you will regret this
     
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  7. Spatula
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    Spatula that you want

    Feb 11, 2026 at 11:17 AM
    No children
     
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  8. BIGFOOT
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    BIGFOOT More than a myth!

    Feb 11, 2026 at 11:31 AM
    Still not nice but at least that makes it easier. Honestly bro I know it's difficult to do but force yourself to k--- all ties.

    Also try not to hit the booze yourself to try and "heal" cos it doesn't work.

    Hope it works out for you bro
     
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  9. 1929357390
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    Feb 11, 2026 at 12:32 PM
    I agree that she has to want it, and want it bad. Consequences don't always carry power.

    If she's hanging on to it saying she can do it responsibly, then it sounds like she's not willing to give it up.

    It's really hard to get sober and make it stick; it usually takes years, though it's different for everyone. Relapse is just a part of that process.

    But I learned the hard way you can't stay with someone no matter how good the good stuff is if you're waiting for them to change and be different. She is who she is.
     
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  10. Spatula
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    Spatula that you want

    Feb 11, 2026 at 12:36 PM
    I know all this intelectually, but emotions are strong. My mind is racing.
     
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  11. 1929357390
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    Feb 11, 2026 at 12:39 PM
    Yeah I hear that. It's hardest if you love them.
     
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  12. BIGFOOT
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    BIGFOOT More than a myth!

    Feb 11, 2026 at 12:49 PM
    You can do it man. One of my X I was with for 4 years she used to try her hardest to make me hit her, never did but this b---- used to spit in my face, punch, kick, anything to try make me lose my s---.

    Was hard at first but I managed to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
     
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  13. icecube
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    icecube West Coast is the Best Coast

    Feb 11, 2026 at 2:12 PM
    If she gives great head then I'd say go for it.
     
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  14. Ricky
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    Ricky mixtape: 05/16/26

    Feb 11, 2026 at 3:04 PM
    There he goes, average Will Smith music enjoyer
     
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  15. Ripper Roo
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    Ripper Roo Last of a Dying Breed

    Feb 11, 2026 at 5:32 PM
    Have you ever tried guided meditation? It can stop the mind racing and give more mental clarity which makes emotions and urges less strong. Plus, when you do feel the urges you can replace it with something better. When you feel the urge, train yourself to immediately do meditation or work out or something else to improve yourself and your mood. It might take a while but you can replace the mind racing habit with a better habit after a while.

    Of course, you aren’t going to be able to get rid of the emotions immediately. It’s okay to let yourself feel them sometimes as long as you don’t give into them and realize that they will eventually pass. Take this time to care for yourself instead of caring for her. You have to build the self-worth to realize that you deserve much better than someone who treats you so horribly.
     
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