Nov 23, 2015

Man we used to do da superman all day in 7th grade

 

Nov 23, 2015

So in 2nd grade we were having a surprise party for one of our teachers and for some reason the day of the surprise, I SWEAR TO GOD some b---- (might've been another teacher) made it seem like the teacher we were planing for knew about the surprise etc and we were just gonna have a normal party for her now

So when the teacher in question walked into the room later that day and said okay we're going to the cafeteria follow me, in typical excited Narsh fashion, I blurted out "FOR YOUR SURPRISE PARTY!!" from the back of the room

Nope. Apparently she was just taking us there to do some exercise and till that moment she had no clue we had been planning this whole shindig for her

f--- me

 

Nov 23, 2015

If you knew how big of a fan of that song was, you'd cringe.
Imagine a fat ugly kid doing the dance, and thinking he was the best hip hop artist.

 

Nov 23, 2015

So me nowadays when I dab

 

Nov 23, 2015

Crank dat was all we'd do while roller blading on Friday nights

 

Nov 23, 2015

I pissed my pants in middle school, first or second day of class I think.

Teacher wouldn't let me go to the bathroom.

 

Nov 23, 2015

Koolo trying to get one of us to snap. These memories are repressed for a reason.

 

Nov 23, 2015

when i was in year 4 me and my friend were f---ing around with a big permanent marker. not tagging buildings and s---, just drawing on our books and school s---. after a while he writes "EAT s--- AND DIE" across his entire ruler, i crack the f--- up and find it hilarious, so i do the same to my ruler.

Now two 4th graders are walking around the school waving rulers around that have "EAT s--- AND DIE" written on them. everyone in our grade thought it was hilarious cause swearing as a kid was the epitome of comedy. anyways after lunch we go back to class and sorta forget about it. I'm sitting at my desk doing my work then i just see the teachers hand pick up my ruler...
I get in heaps of s--- and have like 3 days detention or some s--- and she confiscated the ruler and left it on her desk. fast forward a day later another teacher from my friends class walks in and see's the ruler. "Students in your class are doing this too!?!??! I've confiscated at least 3 of these this morning!"

to keep this long story a bit shorter, s--- spiraled out of control and teachers went and checked every ruler that people had in our grade. they then got everyone together who did it (about 20 of us, by this time) and pretty much yelled at us till everyone said "oh i just saw coco and his friend do it and we thought it was funny and copied it" they called our parents and we got detention for like 5 days or some s---.

 

Nov 23, 2015

 

Nov 23, 2015

Not sure if this counts but I was 12 or 13 me and my cousins were kicking the ball together and someone kicked it too far and I went to get it. I got it from the street and came running back with it where we were playing. It was like along the beach side where only pedestrians are allowed. And these two girls speeding on a scooter hit me on my left side and before I knew it was across the other side of the street. The girls had no helmets and one was hurt pretty bad on her forhead. I had a few scratches but otherwise seemed ok. People started coming and me and my cousins fled the scene before police or ambulance arrived.

We got somewhere safe and immediately I noticed I could barely move my left leg without it hurting really bad. I could only slowly limp. I told my cousins not to tell my mum because she's the type who'd smack me if I hurt myself for being an idiot and I didn't want anyone to make a big deal out of it.

I was lucky it was still summer holidays so I decided to spend it on the couch playing ps2 so my mum wouldn't find out. I tied a shirt really tight around the part that hurt with a piece of plank inside to keep pressure on in and that helped a bit but I still couldn't walk properly unless going very very slow. I spent that summer replaying all my games. A few days before school would start again I took it off to test it and it was all fine.

I still don't know what kind of injury that was or if it ever properly healed I might get an X-ray done

 

Nov 24, 2015

Hmmm i cant really think of anything EMBARRASSING...

OH! Once in third grade i was doing sit ups in gym and there was this really hot girl next to me that i had asked out the previous day before and she said yes so it was that dumb elementary school dating and on my 29th sit up (i remember it oh so vividly) i farted cause i had to s--- and it literally vibrated the gym floor making every one look at us, to make matters worse it was wet asf



..Ive said to much i feel dumb now

 

Nov 24, 2015

Embarrassing moment #2...


So in 6th grade this boy transferred to my school and he was perfect. (As perfect as a boy can be in 6th grade) ...it was love at first sight, which was a big deal for me, because up until then I hadn't liked boys in that sense ( was a tomboy and not interested in boys like that, I think i secretly wanted to be a boy back then )....

ALL the girls wanted him, he was athletic, quiet, but he had that Gatsby appeal to him.

So this one day we were playing our usual game of tag (boys against girls) and I thought this is perfect I was the fastest track runner in my school (for the girls) so in the back of my mind I'm thinking "okay Shahidah, this is your moment". So I'm pulling out ALL the stops trying to get him to notice me and it works! he starts chasing me and only me around the playground. Next thing I know were running on some small rocks and my ankle slips and I baseball slide on the ground right in front of him! I was so embarrassed!....he was good about it though he laughed at me, asked if I was okay and then helped me up.

After that I never "tried" to get a guy again.

Sorry for making so long, but I had to add the background info.

EDIT:

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Nov 24, 2015

I hated pe and they made me play sports and one time the basketball hit me square in the face, I wear glasses most times, so it hurt like h---, fkn dork.
I skipped a step on the main loggia stairs and somewhat tripped but I did a wobble movement to regain balance, I laughed it off but I was actually mortified.
I kept messing around with my braces cus I had a habit of chewing on pencils and one of the brace fell off of my front tooth so I had to stay that way for a couple days, it was embarrassing.
I once was jumping on the bed and fell off and landed on my right shoulder I tried to hide it but my mom knowing me better than I know myself, saw that I was using my left hand to do things and I'm a righty, and she told me to lift up my arm over my head and when I did I started crying, I was taken to the er and had to wear a sling for a month. idk why I tried to hide it? probably cus I thought I'd get in trouble for jumping on the bed.

I know I have more clumsy moments, I have a huge bruise on my leg right now cus I walked in to the edge of the table at work the other day. I'm so not graceful for someone who did ballet as a kid.

 

Nov 24, 2015

One day we were playing hide and seek. I was like 5-6 years old. I hid in good spot and they couldn't find me. I drank whole pepsi bottle before playing. I needed to pee, but I wanted to win so I peed in my pants. No one noticed that, because I had pants with pantlegs in different colors (one in dark blue, another one in red). Fortunately I peed in dark blue pantleg.

 

Nov 24, 2015

I saw my mates twin who he f----- with a bit like 10 metres ahead of me on the school oval. I had a coin. I thought 'surely there's no way I'd hit him... I'll miss by heaps and that'll be it. Move on.'

I throw the coin and f---in *BING* bullseye right in the back of his head. f--- that must have hurt.

 

Nov 24, 2015

I was 6 years old. I was going to kindergarten at the time. It was one of the first days of kindergarten and I really wanted to have one of the toys from kindergarten: plastic knife. So I waited to grab it when no one were watching and hid it in my pocket. Finally, I got to my home. My mom prepared dinner for me. I was eating it while playing with stolen plastic knife and my mom immediately saw that. I was pretty embarrased. She took it with calmness and said that I need to return it the next day. The next day, I did what my mom suggested. When no one was watching I returned it to the right place. I don't know to this day why I did that. It was so cheap and s---. I could easily afford it. I guess kids have weird ideas.

 

Nov 24, 2015

There is always this teacher we all hate and one day I decided to let her f---ing know. Basically I put needles under her chair, at first we/I thought this would be a great prank, but f---.. when that b---- sat her fat a--- down on that chair, the whole school heard her scream, teachers came rushing into the classroom and this I-never-do-anything-wrong-c-----girl looked at me and I swear my eyes told her to shut the f--- up but ofc she had to point at me and yell ''He did it''.
Got expelled from school in 2 weeks and grounded as well... my parents and the principal agreed that I went to her house with a personal I'm sorry speech.
Got told she pissed herself tho

 

Nov 24, 2015

I know I have plenty but I can't think of anything right now