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Serious Best Posts: How often do you masturbate?

  1. Nori
    Posts: 8,507
    Likes: 37,097
    Joined: Mar 19, 2015
    Location: The Pink

    Nori ☺ Deadpool is my deformed bousin☺

    Aug 7, 2016
    twice a day, once in the morning in the bathroom as i gaze at my g herbo poster, and then at night before i go to bed with the lights off with joe budden's discography playing in the background
     
    #14
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    asvdawg, Maximus, melmel91 and 13 others like this.
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    asvdawg, Maximus, melmel91 and 13 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  2. Final
    Posts: 15,182
    Likes: 36,146
    Joined: Nov 30, 2014

    Final ⚘

    Aug 7, 2016
    ? Everyone knows all the shitposters meet for an annual session... here's footage from last year

    [​IMG]
     
    #7
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    Alpha, Ricky, Nuredin B and 13 others like this.
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    Alpha, Ricky, Nuredin B and 13 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  3. shahidah
    Posts: 4,962
    Likes: 12,072
    Joined: Sep 9, 2015

    shahidah watch me work it JT

    Aug 7, 2016
    OP didn't say how often he masturbates
     
    #2
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    DeletedAccount, Maximus, Alpha and 13 others like this.
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    DeletedAccount, Maximus, Alpha and 13 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  4. DKC
    Posts: 23,404
    Likes: 81,847
    Joined: Nov 23, 2014

    DKC shortygonletmecrush

    Aug 7, 2016
    I only masturbate under two different circumstances:

    1. Days I don't have sex
    2. Days I have sex
     
    #63
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    Groovy Tony, Jaya, Deadpool and 11 others like this.
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    Groovy Tony, Jaya, Deadpool and 11 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  5. Ordinary Joel
    Posts: 29,094
    Likes: 71,648
    Joined: Mar 23, 2015

    Ordinary Joel Happiness begins when selfishness ends

    Aug 7, 2016
    Nothing worse than that feeling of guilt or shame or life contemplating after busting a nut. :mjcry:
     
    #71
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    Groovy Tony, Poohdini, Deadpool and 6 others like this.
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    Groovy Tony, Poohdini, Deadpool and 6 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  6. The Gooch
    Posts: 3,698
    Likes: 8,542
    Joined: Dec 15, 2015
    Location: Hillbillyville, NC

    The Gooch Gucci FlipFlops (aka Rap Game's Steven Adams)

    Aug 7, 2016
    I f---ing hate the last bit of c-m that drips out like 5-10mins after you finish. Like tf, I've already cleaned up once
     
    #44
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    Oldboy, Poohdini, DeletedAccount and 6 others like this.
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    Oldboy, Poohdini, DeletedAccount and 6 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  7. marmin shkreli
    Posts: 4,167
    Likes: 8,481
    Joined: Feb 10, 2016

    marmin shkreli multi til the sun die

    Aug 7, 2016
    I have probably averaged a jerk a day for like five years. About to start dating a Christian girl so the count might rise
     
    #19
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    asvdawg, Poohdini, pluto✰ and 5 others like this.
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    asvdawg, Poohdini, pluto✰ and 5 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  8. Skippy
    Posts: 4,615
    Likes: 10,831
    Joined: Mar 26, 2016
    Location: tx

    Skippy vr

    Aug 7, 2016
    twice a day, once in the morning in the bathroom as I gaze at my g eazy poster, and then at night before I go to bed with the lights off with big sean's discography playing in the background.
     
    #16
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    asvdawg, Ordinary Joel, DKC and 5 others like this.
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    asvdawg, Ordinary Joel, DKC and 5 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  9. The Gooch
    Posts: 3,698
    Likes: 8,542
    Joined: Dec 15, 2015
    Location: Hillbillyville, NC

    The Gooch Gucci FlipFlops (aka Rap Game's Steven Adams)

    Aug 7, 2016
    If you touch yourself, your penis falls off and goes to another dimension where dogs chew on it. But I'm so determined to masturbate I went that dimension and got it back
     
    #46
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    Alpha, Ordinary Joel, Cerrone and 4 others like this.
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    Alpha, Ordinary Joel, Cerrone and 4 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  10. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    Posts: 19,389
    Likes: 56,879
    Joined: Dec 14, 2015

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Aug 7, 2016
    I have a routine every night whete i smoke 4 bowls, bust a nut then go to sleep
     
    #33
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    Oldboy, pluto✰, Ordinary Joel and 4 others like this.
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    Oldboy, pluto✰, Ordinary Joel and 4 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  11. Pato v3
    Posts: 5,969
    Likes: 9,599
    Joined: Aug 4, 2015

    Pato v3 exilio

    Aug 7, 2016
    You first champ.
     
    #3
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    Alpha, Ordinary Joel, DKC and 4 others like this.
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    Alpha, Ordinary Joel, DKC and 4 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  12. Oldboy
    Posts: 51,226
    Likes: 160,686
    Joined: Feb 14, 2011

    Oldboy

    Aug 8, 2016
    Yea lets ease up on that even if you buds
     
    #83
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    Deadpool, Ordinary Joel, Jay Zeus and 3 others like this.
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    Deadpool, Ordinary Joel, Jay Zeus and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  13. Lucy
    Posts: 28,738
    Likes: 62,057
    Joined: Nov 29, 2014

    Lucy #1

    Aug 7, 2016
    whenever @I Am Daddy insults me, gets me rock hard. not letting that boner go to waste
     
    #70
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    Deadpool, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, Ordinary Joel and 3 others like this.
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    Deadpool, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, Ordinary Joel and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  14. WPG
    Posts: 11,861
    Likes: 22,506
    Joined: Feb 15, 2011

    WPG sxn80 Rory Gilmore

    Aug 7, 2016
    Whenever Red Rum's mom hits my Gchat.
     
    #68
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    Groovy Tony, DKC, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 3 others like this.
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    Groovy Tony, DKC, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  15. Deadpool
    Posts: 40,384
    Likes: 102,183
    Joined: Dec 23, 2014

    Deadpool the end

    Aug 7, 2016
    just thread banned that n----- no worries

    - DP
     
    #51
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    May 2, 2025
  16. Soldier
    Posts: 29,047
    Likes: 55,349
    Joined: Mar 26, 2011

    Soldier big cuntry's alias

    Aug 7, 2016
    Ban Deadpool please
     
    #48
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    Ordinary Joel, Cerrone, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 3 others like this.
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    Ordinary Joel, Cerrone, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  17. shahidah
    Posts: 4,962
    Likes: 12,072
    Joined: Sep 9, 2015

    shahidah watch me work it JT

    Aug 7, 2016
    I never knew guys even talked with each other about that stuff

    besides masturbation is interesting to me....I grew up learning that you would go to h--- if you touched yourself....so to see you guys talking so openly about it is....interesting lol
     
    #45
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    Groovy Tony, Oldboy, Ordinary Joel and 3 others like this.
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    Groovy Tony, Oldboy, Ordinary Joel and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  18. Lil Wayne
    Posts: 3,464
    Likes: 5,256
    Joined: Nov 28, 2014

    Lil Wayne Tha Carter V

    Aug 7, 2016
    At least twice a day, once in the morning right after I work out and once right after lunch

     
    #5
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    Poohdini, lil uzi vert stan, Gae4Swae and 3 others like this.
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    Poohdini, lil uzi vert stan, Gae4Swae and 3 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  19. DeletedAccount
    Posts: 2,490
    Likes: 6,737
    Joined: Jul 20, 2011

    DeletedAccount

    Aug 16, 2016
    francyboy this is so sweet :emoji_heart:
    ya'll are gonna lose the feeling in your d----s if ya don't chill out
     
    #115
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    CSW, Lucy, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 2 others like this.
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    CSW, Lucy, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and 2 others like this.
    May 2, 2025
  20. Alchemist34
    Posts: 5,096
    Likes: 11,602
    Joined: Feb 22, 2011

    Alchemist34 DO MY HEAD

    Aug 14, 2016

    Seriously are you guys all on SSRI anti-depressants or something what kinda 80 year old a--- sex drive do some of you people have I do it like 4 times a day more or less regardless if I f--- or not

    I'm trying to go on a nofap month though
     
    #102
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    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, Dread or Alive, Michael Myers and 2 others like this.
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    May 2, 2025