May 6, 2016

If anybody remembers me from SL they know I used to be very active and I used to post a lot. Over the past few years I've been basically inactive due to many issues in my life. Today I'm asking for advice from you all. Over the past few years I've dropped out of Duquense University, developed a drinking and coke problem, and I've also started drinking recently. This all happened because of an ex-girlfriend I still love who blames me for every single issue in our relationship. I shouldn't let an ex control my emotions but it's hard when I love somebody. I guess the only reason I'm posting this is because I've been drinking after I blocked her. We stayed together last night and I said Jenny McCarthy's husband has it made because he gets to be with the girl he loves & he gets to be in the movies she is. After that she wanted me to explain why he "has it made" and I said it's because he gets to make money by being in movies and marrying the woman he wants. She refused to think I was telling the truth about that? After that she tried to leave around 12 am and I didn't wanna have her out in a bad neighborhood that late. So I refused to let her leave. I pushed her to stay after I was thrown down the stairs and punched. Glasses broken and teeth broken. I wanna ask am I doing anything wrong? I can admit years ago in high school I lied about talking to you other girls but that was years ago. Should I keep blocking her or try to work things out? I'm a secluded person so I appreciate anybody who has read through all this. I just need some advice.

 

May 7, 2016

@STL2016FUB could probably give you advice on stopping your addictions.

Aside from that I'm not sure what advice to give man.

 

May 7, 2016

Addiction problems yes....Relationship problems no

 

May 7, 2016

I feel like you aren't telling us everything here. It takes a lot for a woman to punch and push a man down the stairs. Not trying to generalize here but it's not in their nature, usually. If something so simple as mentioning a celebrity's life causes that sort of reaction, the relationship has a fatal flaw, a hole in the boat. If you are getting dragged into her anger and coping with her world with drinking, I honestly suggest spending some time alone. Figure things out for yourself. Try to look at your relationship from a third person perspective, as an onlooker. Now, add that relationship to your plans for the future. Do you think it's best for your future plans that you have her along for the ride?

 

May 7, 2016

Need to let her go and move on. Need to change the people, places, and the things you do. I had to quit my job that I had over 11 years and change everything just to get to where I'm at right now. It wasn't easy and I went through h--- with with-drawls from drugs and medication I was on since I was 15. I do not regret any decisions I have made since Ive been sober 78 days. This week has been the toughest of my life though with my dad passing away unexpected and I seen the whole thing. Be grateful for what you have. Life is hard.

 

May 7, 2016

I'd like to add, or ask - is your girlfriend doing coke and drinking excessively? If so, you might have to leave her for your own survival.

 

May 7, 2016

Love is tricky as h--- man, especially when you and your companion put in a lot of effort into it and when nostalgia blinds you. However the bigger problem to solve would have to be sobering up and finding a different way to block out those emotions dude the long-term damage that comes along is just not worth it.

I used to be a heavy smoker and drinker since it honestly helped cope with the stress that came from school and losing people I grew up with. It might have helped calm me down at the time but then I started picking up some bad & unhealthy habits that took me until recent times to fight back. It will require dedication and some big changes but if you feel things are bad now theres no reason to keep it going. Hope things turn out for the better and further people can offer some advice here, and even try searching for help if you feel comfortable enough.

 

May 7, 2016

Leave her, ignore her, never look back.

She is toxic for you, you are toxic for her. The relationship ran it's course. You don't have kids with her (I'm guessing), so there is no longer a reason to continue this "relationship" or friendship that you think you both have.

The reason you think you are in love with her is because you aren't exploring your options, and you're not actively looking for better. Nothing that you explained about her has me believing she is good for you and vice versa.

Find other people, get out. There are multiple outlets you can find and meet women with, so do it.

It is not good for you.

Also, if you are worried about drinking and drugs, find either AA/NA meetings locally, they're everywhere and accept any and everybody, and if you have good health insurance, find a therapist. If you are deep into the drugs/alcohol, and need detox, go to the closest hospital and check into the ER, and they will, hopefully, set you up with a detox program, and start you on the protocol.

 

May 7, 2016

By the way, not to brag or put myself on a pedestal, but this is my profession. Dealing with all types of mental health and addiction problems, and I'm in a master's program for counseling/therapy.

Figured I'd put my two cents in. Hopefully it helps. She's a trigger for you to use and abuse substances.

 

May 7, 2016

therapists are basically failed psychologists and psychologists are just failed psychics

 

May 7, 2016

I need a therapist...I have no insurance right now LOL

 

May 7, 2016

alright so all i got from this post is this

1. u let ur girl beat u up cuz u love her
2. u abuse various perilous substances because u love her and she doesn't love u back the way she's supposed to
3. ur planning on trying to get together with an ex again after 1 and 2 have happened

RUN AS FAST AS U CAN IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION. seriously. find somebody who won't beat on you when they get angry, that's how those cases where the wife stabbed the husband 50 times for coming home late from work happen

 

May 7, 2016

how do u even let that happen tho fr, like she f----- you up not tryna be a d-ck but thats bitchmade

 

May 7, 2016

They are?

 

May 7, 2016

He feels a way about her he couldn't just pop her with a right hand like it's nothing lol

Getting pushed down the stairs though, f---. That's hard for me to picture. If he was caught off guard I can understand but if she was like "SQUARE UP b---- " and straight pushed mans down the stairs, lmaooo

 

May 7, 2016

Thanks for the help everybody, I appreciate the responses. I've ultimately decided to block her today and never look back. its hard af to do this but Ik this is what's for the best.