Oct 11, 2015

I'm sitting by the bed of my grandmother as she loses her battle against cancer. I have been looking after her for a few weeks/months now and it's given me the chance to spend more time with her than I have in the last 6yrs combined. I have told her all that I can think to say yet I worry that once she is gone I will be flooded with thoughts of things that should have been said.


To those of you that have lost somebody close, is there anything you wish you had the chance to say while you still had the time?



R.I.P to all of you who have lost a loved one, I hope you are okay

 

Oct 11, 2015

Ive been in this situation, was sitting besides my grandfather as he slowly drifted away and eventually passed away

Dont worry about what to say, just make it as comfortable as possible for her to go and let her know how much you love her

 

Oct 11, 2015

I don't have advice here but

 

Oct 11, 2015

One of my moments (wouldn't call it regret) was the realisation that I hadn't spend enough time/didn't make enough time with a close friend of mine before he suddenly past away. I know it isn't the same sort of scenario that you're facing but I'm sure your grandmother is happy and feels proud of her granddaughter during this last stage of her life.

So really I don't have any advice, suggestions but to just keep doing what you're doing. Any regret that you feel when you realise you couldn't say this or that will only be fleeting in the grand scheme of things.

 

Oct 11, 2015

I lost my aunt to cancer 2 years ago. It sucks. I don't have any advice but I know exactly how you feel

 

Oct 11, 2015

 

Oct 11, 2015

Thanks for the support I'm sorry to hear of the loss your loved ones x

 

Oct 11, 2015

this thread gives me feels...wont explain why tho

 

Oct 11, 2015

I've also lost my grandfather and grandmother to cancer, i'm sure she feels comfortable when you sit beside her. Stay strong

 

Oct 11, 2015

My mom died on February 3rd 2006 and my dad 19 days later. When you are in these situations, you can only spill your heart so much and hope they understand and feel what you are saying to them.

Regret is a b------, but, while the time still exists, make the best of it and say what is on your mind, say your sorries, wishes and leave nothing behind. That person "NEEDS" to feel loved from you and everyone.

 

Oct 12, 2015

@Mimi youre doing a wonderful thing by just being with your grandmother and looking after her. sometimes, actions and just the little things mean so much more, or speak so much louder than words

 

Oct 12, 2015

You don't need to say anything at all if you feel you've said everything. Just be there to make her comfortable. She probably enjoys your presence more than anything. Some things don't even need to be said

 

Oct 12, 2015

My grandma died of cancer 4 years ago. I too was at her bedside but it was the last time she was alert. I couldn't stay though, as I had to go to work, so all I told her before I left was that I loved her. And for the last time I heard her say "I love you too."

I hold that memory near to my heart. Sometimes, just telling them you love them is best, I was glad I even had the chance to say anything to her, and I'm glad I choose that to tell her.

 

Oct 12, 2015

My father passed of a sudden heart attack in 2010. No warning signs or anything. There is so much. I wish I could say. The morning he passed right before I left the house I had a hunch that something seems off but I ignored it because I was in a hurry. I usually NEVER ignore my intuition but that day I did. I just said feel better and see ya later, and to have a good day. I never got to say I love you one last time or to apologize for the huge fight we had the night before. I still haven't forgave myself.

 

Oct 12, 2015

I lost my grandmother and uncle within the time span of less than a month, so that time was very hectic for me..I too didn't feel like i said everything that needed to be said, because there was a lot of back and forth to try and see both of them. @ the same time.

at the time I didn't fully comprehend that it was their last days. 2 funerals in a month was absolutely CRAZY ...I truly think my gma let go because she had to bury her son before her..

I think you are doing good just by being able to spend the time you are spending with her. If anything needs to be said, the most I would have brought up is memories from the past and just tell her that you love her everyday.

 

Oct 12, 2015

I am so sorry to hear about your loses. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been for you and your family, especially the child/sibling of those you lost. I hope you guys are doing okay

 

Oct 12, 2015

Lost my best friend last month, he was battling brain cancer for awhile and despite a lot of valiant efforts in keeping up hope it was unfortunately not meant to be. As human beings we always look for warmth and compassion so just being around your loved ones and keeping them company through those difficult moments will mean a lot. Always remember the good times and memories they provided us. Sorry to hear about your situation as well as everyone else's losses.

 

Oct 12, 2015

We are, thank you..it's been some time since so the healing process has already began. And really all you need is time. Don't focus so much on the negative, there's already enough of that in the world.